Wait! Which team am I playing for again?

I remember when I used to play basketball, back in middle school, which now feels like a long time ago. I hate to admit it, but i actually stunk really bad at basketball. I was always put into the game because every player got a chance to play. I remember one game, and I ended up rebounding the ball, which never happened, and because of my excitement I ended up forgetting that I had to run down the court in order to shoot the ball and get a point, so instead I shot it towards the other teams basket. As soon as I shot it I realized what I had done. Thankfully, I had a terrible shot so the ball didn't make it into the basket. Although no harm was done, I felt so embarrassed. The story is funny to me now, but back then it was devastating, but I did learn something very important that night: stay focused and think about what I am doing instead of acting on impulse.

I find that I can do the very same thing in my faith life that I did that night at the basketball game. When it comes to a life of faith, there is much more that comes with winning or losing compared to basketball where the only thing gained or lost is a trophy. We are dealing with good and evil, heaven and hell, angels and demons, and God and the evil one.

I have realized that it is very easy for me to be going along trying to live a good moral life and having my eyes set on Jesus, but somehow I realize that my life has no reflection of Jesus in it. Where is Jesus in my life? Why am I not happy? How do I become happy? Where did things go wrong? - These are all questions I have asked and sometimes find myself asking quite frequently. I am sure I am not alone with these types of feelings. Living a Christian life is no easy task and it takes a lot of strength and perseverance to be Christ-centered.

When we are left with feelings of emptiness, loneliness, or helplessness, I believe it is so important to take a step back. If we just keep pushing ourselves towards Christ, it gives us no chance to just examine where we are, where we want to be going, and what we must do to get there. We must take the time in prayer to not just be the ones talking to God, but to allow God to do the talking. We must allow ourselves to sit in silence and be intimate with the God of the universe, who is closer to us than we could ever imagine.

It is through prayer that we can allow God to be the focus of our life, but even more to guide us to himself. He is the Way, the Truth, and the Life (John 14:6). God sent his only Son, Jesus Christ, into the world so that we can have life in him. Jesus Christ has not left us. He is in every church, whether exposed or in the Tabernacle. If he is to be our focus, and ultimately if our goal is to be in heaven with Jesus Christ, then why are we so afraid to step into a church and pray? It isn't just the house of God, but it is our home as well. We should feel comfortable walking into a church, besides just for Mass on Sunday. It is in the silence of prayer, where the heart is united to Jesus' Sacred Heart. It is where we no longer need to worry about life, but surrender it to Jesus. It is where we can intimately feel the love that we find on the Cross, but also where we can love the Lord who deserves our devotion to him.

If your life, especially your faith life isn't going as well as you thought it was, I encourage you to go to Jesus, and let him pick up the pieces of your life and give you a new one. Christ is not a god who likes to give his faithful lives that have been superglued back together, but the God who will take our old lives into himself and give us a brand new life in him. Please don't think that this just happens at the time of our Baptism, but it happens many times throughout our lives. This time of prayer is the time of stepping back and looking at the life that is being lived, but at the same time it is drawing you ever closer and more intimately to Jesus Christ, God the Son (not just a son of God).

A terrible thing to happen would be if you lived your life thinking you were living for God and then one day realized that you were actually playing for the wrong team. Let go of the control and give Christ control. We don't want to be Christians who profess to have faith in God, but our piety is fake and our actions aren't ones of love. Take the time time to examine your life and if need be, examine your conscience, in order to prepare yourself for the Sacrament of Reconciliation (You can never go and be forgiven too often). Pray and see where the Spirit is leading.

Jesus will always be right behind you, all you have to do is turn around. Find him in Adoration or just in the Tabernacle, while in complete silence.